Don't put all your eggs in one basket
Women are born with all the eggs, or oocytes they will ever have throughout their lifetime. Our egg fate is sealed before we ever leave the safety of our mother's womb, having been predetermined during our foetal development. Unlike our male counterparts, we cannot generate more sex cells (gametes) during our lifetime, we cannot pause their release, nor can we reproduce at the ripe age of eighty.
Time it would seem is against us ladies from the very beginning. In my case, time has been against me even prior to me noticing those peculiar feelings of attraction towards another person. Then there was the time when it wasn't the right time and so I went about my daily life, living, experiencing and loving. I dated, I traveled, I cooked and drank and laughed and wept as my biological clock silently ticked from within me. I fell in and out of love a small handful of times before I met someone who made me desire something extraordinary with them and so we decided after lengthy discussions over hot tea, movies, dinner, drives through the countryside and even whilst floating on our surfboards at the back of the breakers that we wanted to become parents.
Initially we wanted to adopt and if I'm being honest, I still want to but there is another feeling that begins somewhere from within my body that gently urges me to want to try to make a miracle happen. To grow and nurture, to sing to and nourish a little being inside me; the perfect mixture of a beautiful Malaysian man and a gentle Australian woman. I wish it were as simple as doing everything right and it will happen but for a select few of us, it's not that easy.
There's an old saying that goes, 'Don't put all your eggs in one basket'. We women have two baskets, our ovaries and in my case, one of these baskets is broken, destroying all of the eggs within. Through no choice of my own, all of my remaining eggs are in one basket, which is rotten luck and yet my story does not end here...
Bella xx
Fertility is such a tricky thing for something we often take for granted until faced with news that it is otherwise.
ReplyDeleteThat being said I have one functioning ovary and one functioning tube and even though they aren't on the same side I have gotten pregnant twice since finding that out. So sometimes we are lucky. I hope you are lucky in your journey to be parents whether that is through pregnancy or adoption.
Thank you for sharing your story here. It warms my heart to know that there's hope, despite a fairly negative prognosis.
DeleteYou're very blessed to have had two pregnancies.
Bella xx
I spent years trying not to fall pregnant. Then years crying every month when I cannot. I am too old to adopt. Too old to produce eggs. Yet unfortunately my heart has not realised this
ReplyDeleteThere is so much to be grateful for in life and children are one incredibly important aspect. I'm sorry to hear your story, my heart goes out to you and I admire your courage for sharing it here. Thank you.
DeleteBella xx
Oh bella. My friend had this also and she now has a beautiful 2 year old.
ReplyDeleteI always thought it quite poetic (the egg being made whilst we were still invitro) I tell my Mum that me her and my girls are like those Russian dolls? The eggs that made them grew in me whilst I was in her tummy.
I will keep everything crossed for you guys...where there is a will there is a way!
I love the Russian dolls analogy, very clever! We definitely have the will to expand our family and it will work out for us because of determination, love and hope. Thank you for sharing your friend's story.
DeleteBella xx
Thinking of you. xo
ReplyDeleteThank you, it's nice to have so much support in the blogging world.
DeleteBella xx
Oh Bella I hope your story takes a beautiful miraculous turn and you get what you desire and what is in your best of intrest. Take care.
ReplyDeleteThank you Supreet. We take each days as it comes and are mindful that there is much to be grateful for in our lives. Thank you for your kind words.
DeleteBella xx
oh sweetie! as a woman who didn't find a man till i was 36 i felt this post! I am obsessed with this idea of us being born with all our eggs inside us, i did an entire solo exhibition based on the idea and still am not done with it! great analogy and big hugs your way xxx
ReplyDeleteHi Jane, somehow I missed your comment (years ago!). Thank you for writing here. Is there somewhere I can see your exhibition
DeleteBella x